Why We Should Work on Our Birthday
This morning, while going through our daily morning routine, my husband said, “I probably should’ve taken the day off—it’s my birthday.” Without thinking, I replied, “Yeah, you should have.” And then I caught myself. Why "Should" he? Why didn’t he take leave? More interesting: why didn’t he need to?
He has a tough job. Long days. Real problems. And he still chose to show up—on his birthday—because he likes being there. He sees his impact. He feels supported. He enjoys doing the heavy lifting next to people he trusts. That got me thinking about what it takes to make work a place you wouldn’t mind being, even on your birthday.
I’m not arguing we should all actually work on our birthdays. Take the day. Eat the cake. Celebrate. What I’m saying is: leaders should build environments where people wouldn’t mind working on their birthday—because the work is meaningful, the culture is healthy, and the team is worth showing up for.
So what makes that possible?
1) Trust (the baseline for everything healthy)
Trust is both the floor and the scaffolding. Leaders earn it by modeling trustworthy behavior—keeping promises, telling the truth, setting clear expectations—and by not accepting anything less from themselves or their teams. Trust is also how we move fast without breaking people: when I trust you, I don’t spend energy protecting myself; I spend it solving problems.
2) Psychological safety (trust in action)
Amy Edmondson’s work reminds us that high-performing teams are not afraid to speak up. Psychological safety is what allows candor, questions, and dissent without fear of ridicule or reprisal. It’s the difference between “I’m keeping my head down” and “I’m leaning in.” If you’ve ever looked forward to a hard day because you knew your team had your back, you’ve felt this.
3) Clarity (consistency beats perfection)
People can’t feel effective in a fog. Clarity of purpose, priorities, and roles turns frustration into momentum. Lencioni has long pointed to dysfunctions like absence of trust and lack of commitment; in my experience, clarity is the antidote that unlocks commitment. When expectations are consistent (not perfect—consistent), work feels fair and doable. Job satisfaction follows.
4) Line of sight to impact (both short- and long-term)
It’s not enough to “do work”; people need to see the difference their work makes. Leaders who regularly connect today’s tasks to tomorrow’s outcomes create fuel: quick wins to sustain energy and longer arcs to provide meaning. When someone can point to a screen, a customer, or a story and say, “I did that,” they don’t dread the calendar—they own it.
5) Belonging and shared load
There’s a unique satisfaction in carrying a heavy load with people you respect. Celebrate the assist, not just the heroics. Create rituals that honor teamwork: simple debriefs, appreciative shout-outs, “we learned” moments. When the hard is shared, the hard becomes energizing.
Non-negotiables leaders must foster
If you want a culture where people wouldn’t mind working on their birthday, build these into the operating system—not as posters, but as practices:
Model trustworthiness daily. Keep commitments, be transparent, and protect standards—even when it’s inconvenient.
Make it safe to speak up. Invite dissent, thank candor, and respond to mistakes with learning, not blame.
Remove the fog. Define what “good” looks like, align priorities, and keep them steady enough to feel fair.
Show the scoreboard. Track and share outcomes that matter so people can see progress and purpose.
Normalize shared wins. Recognize teamwork, not just individual hero moments.
Try this (The P2P Lens for the week)
A simple, practical audit you can run with your team in the next seven days:
Two-Question Pulse: Ask, “What’s one thing you’re proud of this week?” and “Where are you blocked?” Close the loop within 48 hours.
Clarity Check: For your top three priorities, write a single sentence for each: What it is, why it matters, what ‘done’ looks like. Share it.
Psych Safety Signal: In your next meeting, explicitly invite pushback: “What am I missing? Who sees it differently?” Thank the first person who speaks.
Impact Moment: Connect one task to one outcome—today. “When you updated that process, here’s what changed for our clients.”
Shared Load Ritual: End the week by calling out one cross-team assist that made a hard thing possible.
If you do nothing else, do the Clarity Check. In my experience, clarity produces consistency, and consistency helps foster trust. That foundation is what makes the tough days—yes, even birthdays—feel worthwhile.
We don’t need everyone to work on their birthday. But we do need workplaces where people feel safe, clear, trusted, impactful, and together. Build that, and you’ll find more people choosing to show up—not because they have to, but because they want to.
Happy Birthday my love; I'm so grateful you wanted to go to work.
—Mike
The P²P Lens — a leadership perspective you can apply today.
